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Epsiode 256 Songs, Cars and Guitars!



Comedian J Chris Newberg joins the #naplescaptainslog and sings us some improv songs on his guitar! Tune in “Little Buddies!”

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Watch Full Video —————> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lTnHs2CdmB8

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Barrel Aged Dark Rum, White Rum, and Gin!

Check Comedian J Chris Newberg out and show him some love at:

PODCAST RECAP

Miss something on one of our episodes of the #naplescaptainslog? Don’t worry we got you covered! Here you will find a full transcript from this episode of the #naplescaptainslog!

Captain Brien: We are live. J Chris Newberg guys, what’s happening?

J Chris Newberg: This is the brand new theme song to your show.

Captain Brien: I’m ready. I’m gonna share it.

J Chris Newberg: Okay. Tell me when you want me to start.

Captain Brien: You can start.

J Chris Newberg: Okay. ♪ We’re down in Florida ♪ ♪ That’s in Florida ♪ ♪ We’re on a podcast ♪ ♪ In a car ♪ ♪ It’s a Captain’s Log ♪ ♪ And Brien will not drive unless I’m playing ♪ ♪ My guitar ♪

Captain Brien: We have to play the guitar.

J Chris Newberg: ♪ And if you doubt how much I die if we crashed ♪ ♪ You would not be wrong ♪ ♪ What’s up with that ♪ ♪ Get your vodka ♪ ♪ Get your comedy ♪ ♪ Get your early morning radio three stops before 8:00 a.m. ♪ ♪ Oh it’s 8:39 Captain’s Log ♪

Captain Brien: Thank you, that was off the cuff buddy. Here we go.

J Chris Newberg: I think people could tell.

Captain Brien: You think, you think?

J Chris Newberg: I think they could figure it out.

Captain Brien: You don’t think that was scripted.

J Chris Newberg: No, I think it was good.

Captain Brien: Appreciate you joining me man. It wasn’t really by choice. You just have to do radio and this is what we do for touring comedians, huh?

J Chris Newberg: This is the gig.

Captain Brien: And I get you in the car so I can ask you a bunch of good questions.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, comedians with guitars getting driven.

Captain Brien: In the cars.

J Chris Newberg: In the cars.

Captain Brien: With guitars.

J Chris Newberg: With guitars.

Captain Brien: And you didn’t want a coffee this morning, huh? I asked you.

J Chris Newberg: I don’t drink coffee.

Captain Brien: I asked you if you want Dunkin’ Donuts, anything.

J Chris Newberg: Nope.

Captain Brien: Breakfast or nothing, you just go straight up.

J Chris Newberg: No I’m trying to starve myself for when I host Confetti on Wednesday.

Captain Brien: Oh okay, so is this a fast? That’s what they call it these days.

J Chris Newberg: Well no, I do the intermittent fasting. Yeah, twice a week.

Captain Brien: How does that work? Tell me what you do.

J Chris Newberg: Well you just, it’s 16 hours in between meals where all you’re allowed is water.

Captain Brien: Right.

J Chris Newberg: It’s not so hard.

Captain Brien: No it’s not that hard ’cause you do it at night. I do it actually.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah you go like, I’ll stop eating at like nine. And then I can eat at 1:00 p.m.

Captain Brien: Yeah, it’s not that hard.

J Chris Newberg: No and people are always so confused, they’re like, well they should call breakfast something ’cause you’re breaking a fast. I’m like, how ’bout breakfast?

Captain Brien: Yeah breakfast.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, which is another thing. It’s just like, why don’t they have a magazine about making America great again called Magazine?

Captain Brien: Yeah, I get it.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, that’s a thing, that’s a thing.

Captain Brien: That should be coming.

J Chris Newberg: Shout out to Carl Rimi.

Captain Brien: Carl Rimi, comedian extraordinaire, been on the show many times, my good buddy.

J Chris Newberg: Carl, I hope he didn’t make you play guitar.

Captain Brien: No, Carl doesn’t play the guitar. Carl likes to hit the gym, works out.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, he knows about intermittent fasting.

Captain Brien: That’s right, that’s right he does, he does. So where are you coming in from?

J Chris Newberg: I was just in Los Angeles. And I flew to Florida, Flo-Rida, as the cool kids like to call it, by way of Atlanta.

Captain Brien:  Atlanta, the ATL.

J Chris Newberg: Yep, the ATL. Heard a really horrible conversation. I refer to myself as airplane Chris. When I get tired, I get irritated, like irritable. And I’m not even doin’ a bit. Like I just can’t not get annoyed out loud. And I’m a pretty calm person, but like if I haven’t slept in a bunch. There was this guy and he was hitting on this girl in front of me. You know, like when you’re in line on the jetway, and you’re just trying to get on the plane and it’s all bottlenecked and whatever. This guy’s in front of me and he’s like oh, there’s a Shake Shack here at the airport. Isn’t that weird? And she’s like, that is weird. He’s like I like Shake Shack shakes. He’s like, they’re good. She’s like, that is weird. He’s like, do you take Uber? And I was like, come on. What are you talking about?

Captain Brien: What are you doing? J Chris Newberg is our guest today on the Captain’s Log. Guys, you can find him @thechrisarmy right?

J Chris Newberg: @thechrisarmy. Shoutout to Brendan Mulvena.

Captain Brien: Yeah, Brendan Mulvena in the house watching the Captain’s Log here today. So Chris, this is what, is this your fifth or sixth time here?

J Chris Newberg: I think it’s more than that. I was two years prior to when the pipe burst in Marco Island at that house we stayed at.

Captain Brien: Oh wow, in the ceiling or whatever?

J Chris Newberg: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Yeah, and the whole ceiling fell.

J Chris Newberg: Whole ceiling fell. I was there two years before that.

Captain Brien: Wow, that was a while ago. My goodness. So you might even have been 10 times here.

J Chris Newberg: I think so, yeah.

Captain Brien: And have we ever done the Captain’s Log?

J Chris Newberg: No, this is the first time on the Log.

Captain Brien: This is the first time on the Log man. It’s because I was kinda lazy. I would only do it randomly. I should have done it all the time though.

J Chris Newberg: First off, you’ve never been lazy. Shout out to Vicki Baker.

Captain Brien: Hey Vicki.

J Chris Newberg: You’ve never been lazy. Every time I come in town you’re like, oh I got this new thing. I invented the straw, you know. Or like oh, have you thought about putting, you know, iPads on top of the roof of your car so that like planes can see. You’re a hustler.

Captain Brien: I know, I know. I’m always coming up with something. Imagine if I acted on everything that I thought of though.

J Chris Newberg: I mean, there’s time.

Captain Brien: There is, there is. I try to do as much as I can, but I can’t do it all. It’s the story of my life.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, it’s crazy.

Captain Brien: One day, something’s gonna hit big though.

J Chris Newberg: Absolutely.

Captain Brien: It’s gonna hit big, big time.

J Chris Newberg: I believe in it.

Captain Brien: You know, I’m pushing this vodka right now.

J Chris Newberg: Oh that’s right you have vodka.

Captain Brien: Sugar free, gluten free.

J Chris Newberg: Sugar free, is it better? Or is it competitive with Tito’s?

Captain Brien: It is. It’s actually very similar because the style of distilling that Tito’s does, we do the same thing. Although, we’re 26 calories less than Tito’s. I don’t want to brag but.

J Chris Newberg: No, you don’t need to. It brags itself.

Captain Brien: It’s organic and it’s all Florida made.

J Chris Newberg: You’re using all the right buzzwords.

Captain Brien: We are, we are.

J Chris Newberg: Do you only use that vodka in your restaurant?

Captain Brien: I do, I do.

J Chris Newberg: So no one can, if I come in, I’m like, I’d like a Tito’s.

Captain Brien: We have Tito’s and we have well. But for the most part, everything is, all of our specialty drinks are Captain Briens. All my gin, my rum, my vodka, my dark rum. It’s all made like that.

J Chris Newberg: Do you have a to-go license? Can people buy it there?

Captain Brien: I sell it in almost 70 stores in Florida and I just broke out of maybe about 180 new stores that are signed to deal with. Can you play me a tune?

J Chris Newberg: Yeah absolutely.

Captain Brien: Dude, play me something that, I love some of the new stuff.

J Chris Newberg: Okay. You want me to leave the, do you want me to do.

Captain Brien: No, you can go full on baby, full on. This is the Log.

J Chris Newberg: It’s the log.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

J Chris Newberg: Okay, all right how ’bout this one. Okay, I’ll do the voicemail one that I just did.

Captain Brien: Oh I like that one.

J Chris Newberg: This should be everybody’s outgoing voicemail because everybody hates when people call them. ♪ Please don’t leave a message ♪ ♪ And I hate that you called ♪ ♪ If you leave a voicemail ♪ ♪ I’ll kick you in the balls ♪ ♪ Nevermind, just hang up ♪ ♪ I hate you now ♪ ♪ Please don’t leave a message ♪ ♪ Please don’t leave a message ♪ ♪ Please don’t leave a message ♪ ♪ Nevermind, I blocked you ♪ There you go, it’s short.

Captain Brien: People aren’t leaving messages anymore right? You call. If you do want to talk to ’em, you call. And then when the message comes on, you immediately hang up and you send ’em a text.

J Chris Newberg: It’s lazy.

Captain Brien: Isn’t that how it works?

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, why not just send ’em a text?

Captain Brien: I think because if you want to get something out right away and you’re driving, you call. Otherwise, I think you do send a text.

J Chris Newberg: I think that’s the way to go. I do a lot of the voice texting.

Captain Brien: I do the video. Like if I’m driving, I just put on record, send a video, like hey, this is me, this is what I want to tell you. And you are gonna click on this message and watch it.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah that’s great.

Captain Brien: That’s how I do it.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah I do it. It’s like it’s super old school and everything. But you know, it’s easier if I’m driving. Are you allowed to text in Florida?

Captain Brien: You are, but I put the phone right there, and I just hit play and record.

J Chris Newberg: That’s crazy.

Captain Brien: Boom and I just do it and talk.

J Chris Newberg: That’s nuts.

Captain Brien: It’s good though. I love the technology these days.

J Chris Newberg: Technology’s huge. Can you imagine when you were younger, when you were growing up and you were on the bike, or the scooter, or the skateboard? Side note, I think the hardest part about scooters is that people have to see you on them.

Captain Brien: Yeah, that’s the roughest.

J Chris Newberg: That’s the worst thing. When you were, you know, at your wee smallest, did you ever think, hey there’s gonna be a time in my life where I’m driving, I’m on the phone doing a podcast, pitching a vodka I’ve created, and then on my way to another radio station to promote so people come out to my restaurant comedy club and it’s all technology?

Captain Brien: No I did not ever think of those scenarios together.

J Chris Newberg: What was the dream? Like, what did you want to be?

Captain Brien: A chef.

J Chris Newberg: A chef.

Captain Brien: I wanted to be a chef and I wanted to have a restaurant. And I accomplished that pretty quick. I mean, when I was 23, I think I was 23 and I opened up my first restaurant in Marco Island. So that was done. The dream was met. And then it’s never stopped.

J Chris Newberg: Okay the brand new dream. So once you hit the goal, is it like Mr. Jones from Counting Crows? You’ve got all your dreams come true and then you hit a new.

Captain Brien: I like the struggle, yeah. I like the struggle of getting there. And then I kind of, I feel like the novelty wears off a little bit once it gets to the plateau of success. I want to go on to the next thing. But I always have to have a couple little irons in the fire at once. That keeps me goin’.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah I get bored. Like I mean, it’s not just music, or just standup, or just writing. If I’m on the road, I want to be on a show. If I’m on a show, I want to be on the road. I want to be writing. I want to do all that other stuff. So yeah.

Captain Brien: So your recently started a new podcast.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, my podcast is fun. You guys should check it out, Heroin Has a Great Publicist. It’s about things that are fucked that people do anyway. And if anybody who is listening to this show or watching on my page, shout out to the addicts. What up kids, what up fam? It’s such a fun thing. It’s like, regardless of how many people are watching or listening, there’s something so powerful and honest about being able to do a podcast ’cause you’re just talking. Like the people who listen, whether it’s the seven now live, or 700, however many it is that it ends up being, they come to you. Maybe not all at once, but when they have time. It’s just like things you download. But they’re legit fans. And they want to be there. They want content.

Captain Brien: And they interact and they send you messages and it’s fun. It’s like a whole family. You call it The Chris Army.

J Chris Newberg: I do, I call The Chris Army.

Captain Brien: How’d you come up with that?

J Chris Newberg: I hated my last name. I don’t really hate it. But it’s like it’s not memorable because I have the pretentious first initial J, born James, go by Chris. So I was J Chris Newberg. Which arguably could be as Mellencamp popular if I became huge. But it’s not the most immediately memorable. You know, it’s like the Yngwie Malmsteen of like names. You know, Brien Spina, that’s sharp. Then you got the Captain. It’s there, you’re already there.

Captain Brien: It’s all three?

J Chris Newberg: Yes.

Captain Brien: I need something for my followers. I keep asking somebody to name the followers. What are they gonna be called?

J Chris Newberg: The little buddies.

Captain Brien: The little buddies.

J Chris Newberg: my God, that’s great. The little buddies.

Captain Brien: That’s what we should be?

J Chris Newberg: Yeah the little buddies.

Captain Brien: I like that.

J Chris Newberg: I’m a little buddy. Yeah, ’cause it’s full on Gilligan’s Island.

Captain Brien: Yeah, oh I get it. And so they’re all like little captains.

J Chris Newberg: They’re all little Gilligans. Oh you could call ’em Gilligans. No, I think little buddies.

Captain Brien: The little buddies is good, but I didn’t get it until you said it full on.

J Chris Newberg: But it’s catchy. Watch Captain’s Log. What’s up little buddies, huge.

Captain Brien: Yeah, it’s cute, it’s cute.

J Chris Newberg: My fans are junkies or addicts. Not legit, but that’s what they go by. And you know, it’s a thing. And then you get like, it’ll be like, it could be a hashtag. Watch Captain’s Log, #LB. You can have little buddy events.

Captain Brien: Little buddy events, I like this.

J Chris Newberg: Then soon you can get in with your little buddy card.

Captain Brien: Oh like a VIP buddy.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, like if you want to come to the show and you want to buy a bottle of vodka, you get 10% off with your little buddy card.

Captain Brien: Yeah, that’s called the Captain’s Circle. I already have that.

J Chris Newberg: All right, well you know what, you need something.

Captain Brien: It’s an annual membership.

J Chris Newberg: It’s not gonna fly for the podcast.

Captain Brien: No, no.

J Chris Newberg:You’re not gonna be like, what up circlers? That not gonna work.

Captain Brien: What up roundabouts?

J Chris Newberg: Yeah roundabouts is good, roundabouts is good. That sounds very Beach Boys song.

Captain Brien: So what’s next for you man? You got this new Facebook show which is cool.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah I’m working on Confetti and that’s fun.

Captain Brien: Tell me the premises of the show because I wasn’t sure when you first said it. ‘Cause I’ve never seen it but I know it’s really popular. And I have to now watch it.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, Confetti’s super popular. It’s a game show that you play on your phone. Your phone is your remote control. It’s touchscreen. Couldn’t be easier. It’s like a 20 minute show. You start off, host comes on, he tells jokes, he gives you shoutouts.

Captain Brien: So when the show, wait, when the show comes live, Facebook has something on your phone that they can touch?

J Chris Newberg: They send you a notification. They’re like hey, Confetti’s live. So you just click on the notification. It takes you to the Facebook page and you just hit play. So it’s not as simple as like an HQ as far as technology ’cause we don’t have our own separate app. There’s actually two steps. However, you know, you follow it and, you know, it gives you the notification, you click on it. Next thing you know you’re playing 10 pop culture trivia questions. Sometimes the shows are themed. Like we had a Star Wars episode the other day and a teacher’s episode yesterday.

Captain Brien: Was that for May the 4th be with you?

J Chris Newberg: It was.

Captain Brien: Ah, I took a good guess there.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah, absolutely. And you know, we get good numbers. And sometimes we’ll give away $50,000. Sometimes we’ll give away 15 and five usually. But it’s definitely, like tonight’s episode is 10,000.

Captain Brien: And you have like hundreds of thousands of people watch.

J Chris Newberg: We do not have that much. We have like around 30,000 per episode live. And then people who watch the show afterwards, it’s like three, 400,000. Yeah, but they can’t win if they’re not playing live.

Captain Brien: They have to play live to win.

J Chris Newberg: To win, yeah.

Captain Brien: So once they see the show though, I can imagine that they’re dying to play live the next time.

J Chris Newberg: Everybody gets hooked.

Captain Brien: Everybody, right.

J Chris Newberg: Yeah I mean it’s like it’s fun.

Captain Brien: This sounds awesome.

J Chris Newberg: It’s a more fun version of HQ.

Captain Brien: I do on Saturday morning, sometimes, I do barter with the captain. So they can barter with me anything they want. So if they want to get vodka, or tickets, or I have gift cards, or I even have like stuff laying around the house. They can barter with me like stuff that they have and I trade ’em out. And people like to do that.

J Chris Newberg: That’s awesome.

Captain Brien: It’s fun, I think that’s really, a lot of entertainment is gonna be coming this way I think.

J Chris Newberg: I mean I think, well there’s a new platform that’s hitting January 1st, 2020. It’s called Quibi. Quibi I want to say is Jeffrey Katzenberg’s new entertainment arm. And there’s over a billion dollars and it’s going to be basically an entertainment app on your phone. But you’re like, oh I don’t want another one. There’s too much stuff. There’s never too much stuff if the stuff that’s coming out is good.

Captain Brien: Correct.

J Chris Newberg: You know, you could have a show on Instagram Story. You could technically watch a Game of Thrones on Instagram Story if it were good enough.

Captain Brien: Correct.

J Chris Newberg: So Quibi’s coming out and it’s like they’re looking for content like crazy. What they’re doing is they’re slimming down different formats. They’re taking like, let’s say you say, like an at midnight show, which before was 24 minutes on Comedy Central. Now they’re gonna do a four minute version of Quibi so people can just watch it for four minutes, eat up the content, like it, go boom. And they’re gonna make just as much money off a billion views on a three minute clip as they’re going to on a 23 minute clip. And my theory for that is like the 5-hour Energy drink has ruined and recreated all content because people don’t have time anymore, or we convince ourselves that we don’t have time because we’re being showered with all of this content. And it’s like, so it’s like, if you say to somebody, oh watch this episode. How long is it is the first thing that they say.

Captain Brien: And then when they start watching, they like it. They like it, oh my God. This guy, what’s he doing? He’s like cuttin’ that guy off. They like it, but why do they immediately already start looking for other things.

J Chris Newberg: ‘Cause it’s habit.

Captain Brien: They go to their phone. They’re like oh I love this clip, watch this. And while you’re watching it, you ever have somebody already scroll to something else. I’m like you just told me to watch it. You can’t even stay on the phone. That’s what my kids do. That’s how they work, their generation.

J Chris Newberg: I think honestly, the most popular channel on Netflix is not watching Netflix, but scrolling looking for different things to watch and not clicking. We have such commitment issues caused by such overwhelming amounts of content.

Captain Brien: I agree, I agree. We’re in Estero, Florida now guys. We just left Fort Myers. We left 105.5 The Beat. We’re heading to 1039, Big Mama And The WiLD Bunch. And this is the Captain’s Log. I got J Chris Newberg performing live at Off The Hook Comedy Club tonight and tomorrow, two shows. It’s a pleasure to have you Chris.

J Chris Newberg: Thanks for having me.

Captain Brien: I love always talking to you. But more importantly, can we get out with a song. Can we crank it up buddy?

J Chris Newberg: Another one?

Captain Brien: This guy’s the best, yes.

J Chris Newberg: ♪ You should call your fans ♪ ♪ Little buddies ♪ that’s it.

Captain Brien: That’s it guys, the Captain’s Log. We’re live and we are out. Be good, we’ll be back tomorrow. Have a good day.


Episode 255 Allergy Awareness



Dr. Daller is back in the #naplescaptainslog to educate us on allergies! And Captain Brien tells us how he really feels about Soy!

Dr. Daller will be joining Captain Brien EVERY Tuesday at 2:30 on the Captains Log to answer any questions you may have! Make sure you tune in and comment with your questions!

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Watch Full Video —————> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAFx6xO5dNM

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Barrel Aged Dark Rum, White Rum, and Gin!

Check Dr. Daller out and show him some love at:

PODCAST RECAP

Miss something on one of our episodes of the #naplescaptainslog? Don’t worry we got you covered! Here you will find a full transcript from this episode of the #naplescaptainslog!

Captain Brien: Welcome back. On The Captain’s Log, Doctor Daller is back again. Tuesday, we’re here to talk about food allergies, which is also near and dear to my heart because I feel like I’m allergic to everything.

Dr. Daller: You know over the time people ask me, “How do you guys come up with those ideas?” of those topics that we come up with. So I give all the credit to Captain Brien. Captain Brien is really the producer of this show, and he is going online and looking at what people care about. What people ask Google. What people are looking at Facebook. What people are looking at Instagram. What people care about and what also affect us. I mean–

Captain Brien: Correct.

Dr. Daller: In this case, you know, food allergy–

Captain Brien: I just do this to make sure I get the best medical advice. That’s really all.

Dr. Daller: Free medical advice!

Captain Brien: Yeah, yeah.

Dr. Daller: So Captain Brien said, you know, I have food allergies. Can I say that to the audience?

Captain Brien: Yeah, yeah, no I have, good–

Dr. Daller: I have food allergies and, you know, I’m allergic to soy and and, you know, I have a special interest in that. So I did a lot of homework about it. I did a lot of research. I read a lot about food allergies and I wanted to deliver the best information to the audience.

Captain Brien: Good, I wanna hear it.

Captain Brien: Let’s hear it.

Dr. Daller: And, first of all, I want to tell the audience it’s extraordinarily common. That’s something I was surprised by because when we were kids, we didn’t hear about too many allergies. There was one kid that had a peanut allergy.

Captain Brien: Right

Dr. Daller: But today a lot of kids have peanut allergies. A lot of adults have different allergies from shellfish to fin fish, to pine nuts to regular nuts, to almonds. So it’s, to eggs, to milk.

Captain Brien: Yep.

Dr. Daller: So today we’re going to talk about what’s the difference between–

Captain Brien: Gluten! Everybody says they’re allergic to gluten.

Dr. Daller: Right to wheat specifically. So wheat overall they’re allergic to and some of them to gluten. So we’ll talk about some of the gluten issues. So gluten is not an allergy. It’s a big difference between allergic reaction–

Captain Brien: Correct

Dr. Daller: To intolerance.

Captain Brien: Because if you have an allergy, you have to be allergic to the protein, correct?

Dr. Daller: That’s correct. So but gluten itself is a–

Captain Brien: I know a little bit.

Dr. Daller: Look at that!

Captain Brien: This guy.

Dr. Daller: Look at that, Captain Brien is amazing. He is like an honorary doc. We should call him, hey doc!

Captain Brien: Hey!

Dr. Daller: And today we’ll talk about what’s the difference between intolerance. So, for example, there’s people that are saying, “Well, I can’t, I’m allergic to milk.” Are you lactose intolerant because you’re lacking an enzyme and you have a problem with that? Or you have a real allergic reaction, you get hives, you get diarrhea?

Captain Brien: In the milk, it’s the sugar that they can’t break down.

Dr. Daller: That’s correct.

Captain Brien: And the lactose–

Dr. Daller: For lactose intolerance, it’s the sugar that they cannot break down. So some people are truly allergic to cow’s milk and that’s a protein part.

Captain Brien: But not goat, right?

Dr. Daller: Not goat, that’s correct. How do you know this stuff?

Captain Brien: I know .

Dr. Daller: Captain Brien, I mean every time I’m amazed!

Captain Brien: See, I tell you what!

Dr. Daller: It’s unbelievable.

Captain Brien: And did you know that if you eat cheeses that are hard, dry aged, there’s no lactose in them.

Dr. Daller: That’s correct. That’s, I’m like, I’m impressed. I’m blown away.

Captain Brien: I’m here to impress you Doc.

Dr. Daller: I didn’t expect that at all. I mean I thought that you another comedian, but no. Scientific comedian.

Captain Brien: It’s not all good looks, you know what I mean?

Dr. Daller: That’s right, that’s right.

Captain Brien: Sometimes it’s a few brains mixed in.

Dr. Daller: So, Captain Brien. So people ask, you know, “How do you become allergic to a food, “to peanuts, for example, “or to shell fish or to anything else. “What’s the process?” How do you, do you know that or?

Captain Brien: I do not but I have a question, a follow up question for you.

Dr. Daller: Please, please.

Captain Brien: So, my question is, if you do have a peanut allergy,

Dr. Daller: Yes.

Captain Brien: Why couldn’t, over time, you can, you take a shot for peanuts and your body would not, would it not create–

Dr. Daller: Excellent, excellent, we’ll talk about that. We’ll talk about that.

Captain Brien: A tolerance for that?

Dr. Daller: We’ll talk about that. So, let’s start, I’ll answer that question quickly and then I’m going to expand a little bit more.

Captain Brien: Okay.

Dr. Daller: So when it comes to food allergies the only way out is to avoid that food. There’s no, unlike, you know, penicillin allergies that I can give you a little penicillin and you are going to develop tolerance to that.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Dr. Daller: With food allergy, if you are allergic to soy, you should avoid soy.

Captain Brien: I try, but it’s in everything.

Dr. Daller: It’s very difficult.

Captain Brien: So, why do the FDA let you put soy in every single product?

Dr. Daller: Because only very small percent of the population is allergic to soy. So how many people are allergic, overall, to really truthful–

Captain Brien: Is it the seventh most deadliest allergen on the market?

Dr. Daller: When you have a true allergy, it’s deadly. So 1%, if you are one of the 1%, you can die from an anaphylactic reaction and you’re dead. If you are not making it to the hospital or you don’t have something called an EpiPen, or you take quickly, Benadryl. I mean, you develop an anaphylactic reaction, your blood pressure plummets, your heart rate goes up, your throat, you cannot breathe, you have rash all over your body and you die.

Captain Brien: And they’re irreversible sometimes–

Dr. Daller: Deadly.

Dr. Daller: I mean when you cannot breath, there’s no oxygen, you’re dead.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Dr. Daller: So if you make it to the hospital or you have an EpiPen, sure. So a lot of those parents, you know, with kids, even with adults, they carry an EpiPen with them.

Captain Brien: Correct.

Dr. Daller: Okay.

Captain Brien: My daughter has one–

Dr. Daller: Or you carry some Benadryl.

Captain Brien: ‘Cause she’s allergic to ants.

Dr. Daller: Sure.

Captain Brien: One ant bite, blows up her whole body.

Dr. Daller: Sure, it’s a big deal. It’s a big deal. So how do you develop an allergy to a food. Captain Brien, for example, let’s use an example of an apple. Apple is not very common, not too many people are allergic to apple but when you take a bite of an apple, what happens? It goes into your mouth, it goes down your throat, it go to the digestive system. Your body decides whether it’s going to go and accept that.

Captain Brien: Right.

Dr. Daller: It’s going to give it a pass to absorb all the nutritions, all the chemicals, or whatever there is there that you are digesting. Or it is going to say, “Hey, this is a red alert. “We are not going to accept that. “This is going to be an allergen.” So the protein breakdown, in order to absorb them, the body is saying, “I’m going to accept that” or “I’m not going to accept that”. If it decide that something is not for you, that something is foreign, something is not acceptable, it will put a red tag on it and I don’t want to bore the audience but there is something called IgE-mediated and there are some cells in the body called mass cells.

Captain Brien: I’m going to call it a red tag cell.

Dr. Daller: The red tag cells. And inside that red tag cell there is something called histamine.

Captain Brien: Right.

Dr. Daller: And when those IgE binds on that mass cell they release histamine. You know, Benadryl is an anti-histamine. It blocks that histamine reaction. Same thing with epinephrin. You have a decrease of that histamine. Histamine is something that will give you the hives, will block your airways, will give you the heart rate that is going to go up, your blood pressure will go down. That’s what happens. That’s an anaphylactic reaction when your entire body, all the mass cells are producing. So this is deadly. People ask, you know, give us some example of true food allergies. So the most common true allergy, do you know what is the most common food allergy?

Captain Brien: Uh, dairy?

Dr. Daller: Shellfish.

Captain Brien: Shellfish, yes.

Dr. Daller: Shellfish is the most common but close enough.

Captain Brien: Okay.

Dr. Daller: That’s close enough, no it’s not. No, it’s not close enough but close enough, no. So shellfish is the most common. About 70% of people that have food allergy, which is about 15 million American. 1 in 15 American has some type of a true food allergy. So it’s extremely common. And we’ll talk later on why all of a sudden we’re in–

Captain Brien: I want to know, why?

Dr. Daller: Why.

Captain Brien: Why is there bigger and more allergies everyday?

Dr. Daller: And, you know, when you travel the world and you go to different places, you don’t see it. Today, I go to restaurants with my friend and everybody has a list of stuff to tell the chef, oh I can’t have those, don’t put me this, don’t put wheat and don’t put soy and don’t put that and don’t put that.

Captain Brien: You know what I think?

Dr. Daller: No.

Captain Brien: I think that, you know, you told me everybody has their own beliefs and their superstitions?

Dr. Daller: Right.

Captain Brien: And they know their own medical science?

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Mine is, is that, it’s because there’s soy in every single thing we eat that’s manufactured. Do you know why they put the soy in the manufacturing of most of the things?

Dr. Daller: No.

Captain Brien: Because the soy bean plant is so cheap to grow and it grows so fast, that there’s protein in the soy, right?

Dr. Daller: Right.

Captain Brien: Because it’s a bean.

Dr. Daller: Right.

Captain Brien: Right, so you get protein.

Captain Brien: So when you see a box of cookies, there is no protein in those cookies. Do you know how they get it? They put soybean oil in it.

Dr. Daller: Soy.

Captain Brien: To make the protein show on the back that there is some kind of protein for the FDA.

Dr. Daller: I see.

Captain Brien: Meanwhile, it’s killing everyone.

Dr. Daller: I see, that’s a very good hypothesis, that is not based–

Captain Brien: But it’s bullshit .

Dr. Daller: It’s not based on any science. I want the audience to understand. There is no–

Captain Brien: That’s exactly what I think, though.

Dr. Daller: There is no foundation whatsoever for what–

Captain Brien: Exactly.

Dr. Daller: Captain Brien said right now.

Captain Brien: Right .

Dr. Daller: But it sounds very intelligent.

Captain Brien: But it’s good.

Dr. Daller: It sounds very intelligent, has really no base in reality.

Captain Brien: But they do add the soy to bread, and everything else, to keep the ingredients soft.

Dr. Daller: So, I think–

Captain Brien: And it’s in all packaged and manufactured products.

Dr. Daller: I think you have some of the answers. Some of the answer is manufactured and packaged products.

Captain Brien: Yes.

Dr. Daller: So the idea here is processing. In the old days, a lot of people used to cook at home and even in restaurant it was fresh stuff. You know, you make salad, you cut the tomato, you do all this stuff.

Captain Brien: Correct.

Dr. Daller: Today it’s a lot of processed food because we want it to last a long time. The expiration on any box today is, like, 2027. I mean, stuff are going to survive, you know–

Captain Brien: Right, the apocalypse.

Dr. Daller: Nuclear bombs.

Dr. Daller: The apocalypse. I mean, when you have crazy stuff happening, nothing happen to these boxes. So I think it’s a lot of processing. I think it’s a lot in the environment. I think when you go travel the world, when you go to Greece for example, they make everything fresh–

Captain Brien: They have the Mediterranean diet.

Dr. Daller: The have Mediterranean diet.

Captain Brien: Everybody run to the Mediterranean.

Dr. Daller: And people and no don’t come with a list of stuff for the chef, I cannot eat this, I cannot have that, because you don’t see that, that much.

Captain Brien: But they also use 100% Olive Oil.

Dr. Daller: Yes.

Captain Brien: We can’t go and find Olive Oil in 90% of our foods.

Dr. Daller: That’s right.

Captain Brien: It’s all vegetable oil and the basis of the vegetable oil is soybeans.

Dr. Daller: That’s right.

Captain Brien: Again, because it’s cheap.

Dr. Daller: I know you are going back to soy and I know it’s very dear to you.

Captain Brien: I hate it!

Dr. Daller: But soy, I think, is part of the problem. I think, overall, the processing–

Captain Brien: Yes.

Dr. Daller: The fact that we are not using natural stuff is some of the problem. I mean, and again, we can go back. We did a show here, a podcast here, about plastic bottling and all the plastic stuff that we use.

Captain Brien: Right.

Dr. Daller: And BPA and all this stuff. It’s all related, it’s all connected somehow. Why do we have such an, why food allergies are now in the limelight? I think it’s environmental, some of it. I think some of it is genetic. I think some of it is lack of breastfeeding. You know, when a lot of the mothers now are working, they don’t have the time, it’s a big deal. So there are many, many. I don’t think they are going to do any studies because there is no money involved here.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Dr. Daller: Don’t you understand?

Captain Brien: You always go back to money.

Dr. Daller: Because, unfortunately, that’s how capitalism work. How you going to do a study without money? You cannot do a study. Nobody will sponsor a study,

Captain Brien: But what if they come out with a pill, like they do with the Benadryl?

Dr. Daller: So, unlike, unlike, you know–

Captain Brien: And lactose, there’s no money in the lactose pill. You could buy a hundred of ’em for twenty bucks.

Dr. Daller: Yes but that’s different. So lactose intolerance pills are different than allergic reaction to peanuts. So with allergic reaction to peanuts your only way out is to avoid peanuts. There’s no treatment, there’s no pill, there is nothing you can do. You have to avoid peanuts. You have to avoid, if you are allergic to cashews, you have to avoid cashews. If you are allergic to shellfish, you have to avoid shellfish. And now, some people say, well my allergic reaction is very mild, like–

Captain Brien: They say, if you are allergic to almonds, you’re allergic to what?

Dr. Daller: If you are allergic to almonds you are allergic to all tree nuts. So, you’re allergic to cashews–

Captain Brien: So what’s the closest, the next closest thing is poison ivy right?

Dr. Daller: Is that right?

Captain Brien: That’s what they say, it’s just one–

Dr. Daller: Captain Brien, I mean today you prove it.

Captain Brien: One degree off and we have poison ivy.

Dr. Daller: Is that right?

Captain Brien: And so you’re very highly allergic to poison ivy and almonds are very bad for you as well.

Dr. Daller: Okay.

Captain Brien: ‘Cause I’m allergic to poison ivy as well.

Dr. Daller: I didn’t know that.

Captain Brien: Like, really bad.

Dr. Daller: I didn’t know that. A human being are very, very closely related to rabbits but we are not rabbits.

Captain Brien: This is true.

Dr. Daller: We are not rabbits.

Captain Brien: This is true.

Dr. Daller: So, again, the only way is to avoid, avoid all these allergens.

Captain Brien: Hi, Amy, Kelsey, Danielle. What’s going on ladies? Doctor Daller’s giving me the inside scoop today. You can find Doctor Daller at Revitalize Lounge. He’s in Fort Myers. The guy, not only does he do men’s and women’s well-being, sexual health, but he just, basically, will give you a beautiful diet. His facility’s amazing, I come every Tuesday, we do this show. This is The Captain’s Log. How can they find ya on Instagram?

Dr. Daller: Daller MD.

Captain Brien: Daller.

Dr. Daller: @dallermd.

Captain Brien: Let’s spell Daller.

Dr. Daller: Daller. D-A-L-L-E-R-M-D.

Captain Brien: Yes.

Dr. Daller: And on Instagram, on Facebook. You know, follow me and well, whatever you guys need or follow Captain Brien–

Captain Brien: You can DM both of us or whatever.

Dr. Daller: Absolutely.

Captain Brien: We’ll get you your questions out. We’ll answer ’em on The Captain’s Log. We love to hear what you guys have to say but today, it’s all about allergies.

Dr. Daller: And, again, if you guys have any topics that you guys want to talk about. You know, something interesting, something that you think everybody, not something very specific just for you. Something that everybody, you know, wants to ask and they’re embarrassed, or they’re not embarrassed and they want to know more, please, let us know. We would love to talk about all these topics. I mean, that’s what we do. Captain Brien is delivering here content that is remarkable and free!

Captain Brien: And free, I don’t charge for this.

Dr. Daller: Unbelievable.

Captain Brien: Can’t beat that.

Dr. Daller: Unbelievable.

Captain Brien: They say nothing’s free except water and air.

Dr. Daller: That’s right.

Captain Brien: The Captain’s Log’s free.

Dr. Daller: That’s right.

Captain Brien: That’s amazing.

Dr. Daller: That’s right.

Captain Brien: All right.

Dr. Daller: That’s right.

Captain Brien: So we were moving along on the process of finding out how these allergies started. You’re saying, basically, the environment. You’re saying that, what?

Dr. Daller: So I’m saying, for example, if you go to China very few Chinese are allergic to peanuts. So, I looked why? The Chinese, they put peanuts on everything.

Captain Brien: Everything.

Dr. Daller: Everything is peanuts.

Dr. Daller: So I did some research and I realized that the Chinese, they either deep fry their peanuts or they boil their peanuts. We dry fry them, so it–

Captain Brien: And what does that do? That breaks down the protein.

Dr. Daller: That, what?–

Captain Brien: Hey!

Dr. Daller: Captain Brien!

Captain Brien: So when you cook this–

Dr. Daller: The nature, the nature, the protein, break down the protein so when you cook it in the water, or anything like that, the protein go away. Some of them are denatured. There’s less allergens in them.

Captain Brien: And did you know that 100% of the oil that Chick-fil-A uses was peanut oil?

Dr. Daller: I didn’t know that.

Captain Brien: And so everyone that eats Chick-fil-A, they don’t die of peanuts, right?

Dr. Daller: Right.

Captain Brien: You know?

Dr. Daller: Because it’s deep fried there.

Captain Brien: Yeah, because they heat the peanut oil.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: It’s reyhydronated as well, right?

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: So they take out the protein.

Dr. Daller: Amazing, I didn’t know that.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Dr. Daller: Who else uses peanut oil, the burger place?

Captain Brien: Five Guys.

Dr. Daller: Five Guys.

Dr. Daller: The burger place.

Captain Brien: They use it.

Captain Brien: Five Guys and Chick-fil-A. And a little bit of knowledge is that Chick-fil-A went into panic mode when Five Guys started expanding and they said, hey, we’re going to figure out a different way to fry our stuff because if Five Guys is starting to use all of the peanut oil, it’s gonna to drive the price way up and we may have to look at something else.

Dr. Daller: Wow, I didn’t know that.

Captain Brien: Well a little bit of something, little bit of knowledge, see Doc.

Dr. Daller: That’s amazing, amazing. Normally, they say a little bit of knowledge is dangerous. Not in Captain Brien case.

Captain Brien: Yeah, yeah.

Captain Brien: I learned that at the Five Guys plant with the owner.

Dr. Daller: Really?

Captain Brien: Yeah, like I took the actual, like, I went to–

Dr. Daller: Where is it, where is the place?

Captain Brien:Um, we went to Washington in DC.

Dr. Daller: Yeah, wow, wow

Captain Brien: I took the whole three day course on how to open up a Five Guys and that’s one of the things they tell you. They were working on that as we speak, as the class was going on, is what they were doing was they were negotiating international pricing on peanut oils.

Dr. Daller: So, I let you into a secret. From time to time, I do go to Five Guys but don’t tell anybody.

Captain Brien: I used to love Five Guys.

Dr. Daller: Oh, it’s on live! It’s live on Facebook.

Captain Brien: So while we’re talking about Five Guys, we did a little study recently, me and my son.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Because I like to have a big, thick burger.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: So I said what’s better? The triple, you know, you can get three?

Dr. Daller: Yeah, yeah.

Captain Brien: Not two.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: The standard is two, right?

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I said, “What’s better? “Maybe a triple or should I get two singles?” ‘Cause one doesn’t fill me up.

Dr. Daller: Right.

Captain Brien: So, I have to have two burgers at least or the triple. So, I did the triple and the ratio of meat to burger?

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Not as good as a single, as two singles.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I prefer the two singles.

Dr. Daller: I agree with that. So I did, we went last week to Jimmy P’s.

Captain Brien: Oh yeah?

Dr. Daller: And I did the double. And I didn’t enjoy it as much as the single and I said next time I’m going to have two singles. And it’s funny.

Captain Brien: That’s true.

Dr. Daller: Yeah, it’s like–

Captain Brien: And then you gotta do extra cheese. I gotta have a cheese, like, cheese to beef ratio has to be proper, too.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I’m very particular.

Dr. Daller: So if you eat a burger, eat a good burger.

Captain Brien: Yeah, absolutely.

Dr. Daller: And so that’s the point, I mean go, if you are —

Captain Brien: Because you can eat a cheap burger and it’s loaded with soy.

Dr. Daller: Correct.

Captain Brien: They use the soy protein.

Dr. Daller: Right.

Captain Brien: And it’s much cheaper than having actual protein from beef. So they add the soy to that and you’re getting garbage.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: You’re not getting meat.

Dr. Daller: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Absolutely.

Captain Brien: You’re getting chemicals.

Dr. Daller: So, yeah, so I love it. I enjoy Jimmy P’s. I enjoy, you know, Five Guys from time to time. Why not? We live only once.

Captain Brien: That’s right, you have to.

Dr. Daller: You have to enjoy that.

Captain Brien: And what did you do with the side orders at Jimmy P’s?

Dr. Daller: I had the sweet potato fries and–

Captain Brien: You went all in, Doc.

Dr. Daller: I went but, you know, when you go, when you have bacon.

Captain Brien: A cheat day?

Dr. Daller: You have to have drool. You have to drool when you eat it. If you go crazy, go all the way.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Dr. Daller: Either don’t do it because it’s a waste.

Captain Brien: You get those calories.

Dr. Daller: No matter what.

Captain Brien: An extra thousand calories ain’t gonna kill ya.

Dr. Daller: No–

Captain Brien: After you go over the 800 meal calorie count.

Dr. Daller: But enjoy it. Have a great burger.

Captain Brien: You better just enjoy it.

Dr. Daller: Why not? Why not?

Captain Brien: I agree with that, I agree with that.

Dr. Daller: Absolutely.

Captain Brien: So, what is… right now, the FDA doing about all these food allergies? Is there something that’s going on?

Dr. Daller: You know, honestly, they’re not doing much. The government, in every country. So I looked at not just FDA. I looked at the UK, what they’re doing. What they’re doing everywhere. So food allergies are on the rise. A lot of people have problems, like, people are dying from food allergies.

Captain Brien: Correct, yeah.

Dr. Daller: I mean, this is serious, this is very serious. 1% of people with food allergies, there is a chance, and a lot of people say, you know, I have mild food allergy. So if you have a food allergy sometime it can manifest itself as mild and the next time you can have an anaphylactic reaction. You can have–

Captain Brien: Really?

Dr. Daller: Yes.

Captain Brien: I challenge it everyday and I’m like, ah, I’m gonna eat that and I’m gonna probably end up taking a Benadryl.

Dr. Daller: And you shouldn’t.

Captain Brien: I should not.

Dr. Daller: You should not.

Dr. Daller: Why, what for, what’s the purpose of that? I mean, if you told me–

Captain Brien: ‘Cause I’m a glutton for punishment. I like good stuff.

Dr. Daller: I think Captain Brien lived in biblical times. So no need, you can really cut off that part of your life. This is not an essential stuff that you’re saying, you know what, I cannot live without. And, you know, just think about it if you had true allergies to cow milk or true allergy to eggs, that’s a big deal. It’s much more common, much more you see than everything.

Captain Brien: Oh you think there’s more eggs than soy?

Dr. Daller: What do you think?

Captain Brien: No.

Dr. Daller: I think–

Captain Brien: Did you know even gum has soy in it? What kind of milk is in there?

Dr. Daller: Yeah, that’s true.

Captain Brien: Soy is in everything. Everything, it drives me crazy.

Dr. Daller: You know, it’s like when you come close to something, you realize it’s everywhere.

Captain Brien: You can’t have the salad dressing. You can’t eat anything. I could keep going. You can’t eat any desserts.

Dr. Daller: Olive oil.

Captain Brien: You can’t have cakes.

Dr. Daller: I mean, you should not have salad dressing anyways.

Captain Brien: You can’t have a cookie. You can’t have chocolate.

Dr. Daller: Olive oil, lemon, salt and pepper. There’s no soy in any one of these. This should be your salad dressing.

Captain Brien: Yeah, it’s true.

Dr. Daller: You should not use none of these stuff.

Captain Brien: That’s true.

Captain Brien: That I agree with.

Dr. Daller: You know, the processed. You know, the processing is key. Avoid the processing. If you do it clean, there’s no problem whatsoever.

Captain Brien: Well guys, we brought you The Captain’s Log. I got Doctor Daller, once again, with all the knowledge for you guys. Free of charge, how can you go wrong? Say hello anytime, drop a message and thanks for watching The Captain’s Log. We’ll be back tomorrow with J Chris Newberg and then, I’ll be live, and we’re doing the man panel on Thursday.

Dr. Daller: Oh, fantastic!

Dr. Daller: Fantastic, that’s gonna be fun.

Captain Brien: And we’re bring Josh Pray.

Dr. Daller: Okay.

Captain Brien: That’ll be excellent on Thursday. And then, on Friday, I have Ahmed Ahmed. And we’re gonna wrap it up, that’s the week guys. This is the man, Captain Brien, we’re gonna see you on the man panel. We’re gonna see you live, tomorrow. We’re having a good time. Doctor Daller and I, we’re out.

Dr. Daller: Bye bye, take care.

Captain Brien: See ya.


Episode 254 Show Me The Money



Actor and Comedian Jay Mohr shows some skin on this episode of the #naplescaptainslog! Ladies don’t miss this episode! They also discuss how Jay became a wrestling coach, a life coach, and make a fishing wager!

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Watch Full Video —————> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JfgW3jVER8

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Barrel Aged Dark Rum, White Rum, and Gin!

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Episode 253 Krazy Krops



Mila Bazley, the founder of Krazy Krops Produce joins Captain Brien to discuss how she started the first ugly produce home delivery service in Naples, Florida!

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Watch Full Video —————> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pP18uTstEyM

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Barrel Aged Dark Rum, White Rum, and Gin!

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Episode 252 Joselito Da Puppet!!



We have a first on the #naplescaptainslog today! Our first puppet, Joselito Da Puppet, makes his debut appearance! Joselito teaches Captain Brien some spanish lingo, discusses his upcoming tour, and his Puerto Rican heritage!

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Watch Full Video —————> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jifzVEQm8pY

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Barrel Aged Dark Rum, White Rum, and Gin!

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Episode 251 Dr. Daller on the Measles Outbreak



Dr. Daller is back again on the #naplescaptainslog to discuss the trending topic of the measles outbreak. What exactly are the measles? How to prevent the measles? And the current outbreak in today’s world! Tune in to to have all your questions answered!

Dr. Daller will be joining Captain Brien EVERY Tuesday at 2:30 on the Captains Log to answer any questions you may have! Make sure you tune in and comment with your questions!

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Watch Full Video —————> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtP5L0mv3aA&t=28s

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Barrel Aged Dark Rum, White Rum, and Gin!

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Episode 250 Lights for Layla



Lights for Layla founder Jade Morton joins Captain Brien to discuss her upcoming fundraiser. The event will take place on April 27, 2019 at Dixie Roundhouse in Cape Coral, Florida from 4 PM – 7 PM. A $5 donation will go to providing safer school bus stops for kids!

Rest In Peace to Layla Aiken. Thoughts and prayers with Layla’s family during this difficult time. Please get out and help donate to this amazing cause!

Watch the Full Video here — https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUDATNMx4gE

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Sugar Free and Glutent Free Gin, and Barrel Aged Dark Rum and White Rum!

Find out more about Lights for Layla here:


Episode 249 Comedian Ian Bagg Bought a House



Comedian Ian Bagg joins Captain B on this episode of the #naplescaptainslog! He talks about buying his house, his upcoming pilot, and alligators!

Watch Full Video —————>  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Scu1zbz_DUA

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Sugar Free and Glutent Free Gin, and Barrel Aged Dark Rum and White Rum!

Check Comedian Ian Bagg out and show him some love at:


Episode 248 White Women Love Their White Wine!



B-Rad from the Boo, aka Jamie Kennedy, is along for today’s ride with Captain Brien! On this episode of the #naplescaptainslog, Jamie Kennedy talks about how he got started, Malibu’s Most Wanted, his comedy career, and of course Hecklers!

Watch Full Video —————>  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo_A7Cu0FFQ&t=329s

Siri can now help you listen to your favorite podcasts! Say things like “play The Captains Log” or “play my newest podcasts.” You can also ask Siri about the podcast that is currently playing and request to be subscribed! Just tell Siri “subscribe to this show!”

Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

The captain’s log is officially sponsored by Captain Brien Spirits maker of Captain Brien Sugar Free and Gluten Free Vodka, Sugar Free and Glutent Free Gin, and Barrel Aged Dark Rum and White Rum!

Check Comedian and Actor Jamie Kennedy out and show him some love at:

PODCAST RECAP

Miss something on one of our episodes of the #naplescaptainslog? Don’t worry we got you covered! Here you will find a full transcript from this episode of the #naplescaptainslog!

Captain Brien: What’s up guys? We are back. My man – What’s up guys? We are back. My man Jamie Kennedy. Dude, what’s happening?

Jamie Kennedy: What’s up baby? Look–

Captain Brien: This your second appearance on The Log?

Jamie Kennedy: On the Log, dude. You got Live on Air. Your killin’ me dude.

Captain Brien: I know, right. I know.

Jamie Kennedy: I was just sleeping like this and you made me sit up.

Captain Brien: I gotta always keep you awake though. It’s a…

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: You’re ready to go. You’re ready to go.

Jamie Kennedy: Early guys. It’s early guys.

Captain Brien: It’s not hard.

Jamie Kennedy: It’s an early guys. Hopefully this is only going on since. You know.

Captain Brien: Let’s do it. We’re taking a ride now. We just left 105.5, The Beat. We’re heading over to Big Momma and The WiLD Bunch and… Dude.

Jamie Kennedy: So we should document everything.

Captain Brien: I like to keep it real.

Jamie Kennedy: Oh, yeah.

Captain Brien: You know. We do everything live on this podcast.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. Okay.

Captain Brien: The last… We should put the car in drive though–

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: instead of neutral and revving it up right there.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: You got in late?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah, dude. I’m tired. Can we go to Dunkin?

Captain Brien: Dunkin’s my jam.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Are you a Dunkin guy?

Jamie Kennedy: I love Dunkin.

Captain Brien: Yeah. Starbucks isn’t my thing.

Jamie Kennedy: I know, Dunkin’s got the best flavor.

Captain Brien: Oh, you’ve got some comments already.

Captain Brien: Look at these guys. Hey, what’s happening? If you guys want to ask me a question about Jamie Kennedy, I’m sure he’s gonna answer it, but in the mean time…

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: We’re gonna leave Fort Myers and head toward Estero and then back to Naples ’cause you’re at Off the Hook Comedy Club tonight through Saturday.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. I mean–

Captain Brien: One show tonight.

Jamie Kennedy: Mm-hm.

Captain Brien: Two Friday, two Saturday.

Jamie Kennedy: Yep.

Captain Brien: And their gonna get the freakin’ show of their life.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah, man. Wasn’t I like the first dude to play your club?

Captain Brien: You were one of the first major headliners to play the club and we’ve been buddies ever since, right?

Captain Brien: Right. We’ve had some times together.

Captain Brien: We have.

Jamie Kennedy: We can’t talk about ’em live.

Captain Brien: Wait. Why can’t we? We should.

Jamie Kennedy: Uh.

Captain Brien: We’re both single now.

Jamie Kennedy: Uh, I mean, you know. You never know.

Captain Brien: It was a facility that was legal.

Jamie Kennedy: Nah. I can’t–

Captain Brien: We weren’t doing illegal business.

Jamie Kennedy: We were just having some burritos. We were. That’s all we’re doing. I love Florida.

Captain Brien: Florida. Is Florida one of your favorite places to come?

Jamie Kennedy: Dude, it’s the best.

Captain Brien: Who would not want to come? Right, I mean we have all–?

Jamie Kennedy: I don’t know. I don’t know.

Captain Brien: we have great comedy clubs, not just mine, but there’s a ton. Like we have, I think the second or the third most comedy clubs in the U.S.

Jamie Kennedy: I think you do too. I play, like, ten clubs here.

Captain Brien: Right?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I know. The think is like the weather is always nice. You could come here, right now, and relax in eighty degree weather or you could be in Michigan freezing your nuts off.

Jamie Kennedy: Dude, I come in last night, I go to Wing Stop, I get my wings–

Captain Brien: What’d you eat at Wing Stop?

Jamie Kennedy: I had Wing Stop. I ate in the Wing Stop.

Captain Brien: How many wings?

Jamie Kennedy: 12.

Captain Brien: No problem.

Jamie Kennedy: Lemon pepper, bone. I’m happy. The prog–

Captain Brien: Is lemon pepper your jam?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. It’s–

Captain Brien: Always? I never had the lemon pepper at wing stop.

Jamie Kennedy: Ah, the bomb.

Captain Brien: We should go.

Jamie Kennedy: We should right now. I got a plug from Wing Stop.

Captain Brien: Yeah. They should pay us.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: These son of a bitches aren’t giving us any money for this cred.

Jamie Kennedy: It’s a great wing.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: I’m just gonna tell you–

Captain Brien: To get it well done and regular? Extra crispy or no?

Jamie Kennedy: Crispy, yeah.

Captain Brien: Crispy.

Jamie Kennedy: I do like crispy.

Captain Brien: People like ’em crispy.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. I do.

Captain Brien: I go crispy too.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I like hot sauce and then maybe a little sweet and sour.

Jamie Kennedy: Man.

Captain Brien: But, I’m always the guy that’s like, can you give me like two lemon pepper, two teriyaki, two hot sauce? And they’re like, no dude we can’t do that. You got to buy.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah, because you have, uh, asked a lot. That’s high maintenance.

Captain Brien: I’m high. I am high–

Jamie Kennedy: High maintenance wing.

Captain Brien: I’m a high maintenance dude.

Jamie Kennedy: You’re the–

Captain Brien: Do you put blue cheese?

Jamie Kennedy: Nah.

Captain Brien: Or do you do uh–

Jamie Kennedy: I eat them with the lemon pepper, bro.

Captain Brien: No blue cheese?

Jamie Kennedy: Nah.

Captain Brien: Ranch?

Jamie Kennedy: Uh, maybe.

Captain Brien: I don’t know why I’m talking so much about wings.

Jamie Kennedy: I don’t know why either. Dude, wait, you’ve been doing this for what two years? This Captain’s Log?

Captain Brien: Thirteen years.

Jamie Kennedy: I don’t remember thirteen years ago.

Captain Brien: You know why?

Jamie Kennedy: Why?

Captain Brien: Because I was lazy and I was married at the time and my wife, ex-wife now

Jamie Kennedy: Right.

Captain Brien: hated me to always be live.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: And she was holding me down, bro.

Jamie Kennedy: Ah. You don’t want to–

Captain Brien: Now, I’m just like, I’m just live 24/7.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. You’re living the dream.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: Your living the–

Captain Brien: So, I started doing it really like daily now. The show is evey day, except Sundays, sometimes I don’t do it. But if I do it on Saturday, I’ll do like a recap or I’ll go to the Farmer’s Market or something.

Jamie Kennedy: You do a show every day?

Captain Brien: Yeah. Every day, man.

Jamie Kennedy: For how long?

Captain Brien: Twenty minutes.

Jamie Kennedy: Wow.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: The Captain’s Log.

Captain Brien: The Captain’s Log is moving up.

Jamie Kennedy: Wow. Every day you–

Captain Brien: We had 200 thousand views last week.

Jamie Kennedy: Really?

Captain Brien: Yeah. For the week. Not every episode, but for the week. It’s about 150 to 250–

Jamie Kennedy: Okay.

Captain Brien: thousand views between our podcast that’s on podcast, YouTube, Facebook, Instagram.

Jamie Kennedy: All right.

Captain Brien: I mean, you can get it everywhere.

Jamie Kennedy: Man.

Captain Brien: ITunes, Stitcher.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: You should tell people how they can find you.

Jamie Kennedy: You can find me at thejamiekennedy on Insta, atjamiekennedy on Twitter, uh–

Captain Brien: By the way he’s crazy to follow.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Do you do anything normal every day or is your day just wild?

Jamie Kennedy: I don’t know. It mixes it up.

Captain Brien: You do, right?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. But some days I like to do nothing, but I don’t know, in a weird way.

Captain Brien: It is a weird life traveling. A traveling comedian is not normal.

Jamie Kennedy: Uh-uh. Uh-uh.

Captain Brien: It’s… There’s a distinct person that it takes to be on the road this many days.

Jamie Kennedy: Well–

Captain Brien: I mean not everybody wants to do it. I don’t want to do it.

Jamie Kennedy: I heard this lady talking to her kid yesterday and her kid’s news it was like a long–

Captain Brien: You gotta talk a little louder.

Jamie Kennedy: I heard–

Captain Brien: I mean, this place is really mic’d up for sound.

Jamie Kennedy: Really?

Captain Brien: Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: I’m trying to be normal.

Captain Brien: No, you gotta talk.

Jamie Kennedy: God! He wants me to be loud. I saw… Dude, come on, you kidding me? I can’t talk normal?

Captain Brien: No, you gotta–

Jamie Kennedy: You can’t hear all that?

Captain Brien: I want to make sure.

Jamie Kennedy: but they can’t. Dude, this lady was traveling with her daughter and the daughter was like man, we traveled so long. We took… It was five hours, two to drive to the airport and three on the flight. I’m like, that’s just one of my flights today.

Captain Brien: Right. Exactly.

Jamie Kennedy: I did two flights today. One flight yesterday.

Captain Brien: And you called me at 4 in the morning.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: And you were like yo, I want to change my flight.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I was like, dude, who else am I gonna call to confirm any of this? Like, I’m the only idiot up at 4:30 a.m. listening to you.

Jamie Kennedy: And he was up and using like, exclamation points. Like, hey, buddy, I don’t know if we can G. Like you were up, dude.

Captain Brien: I usually am. I’m, like, ready to go. Why were you up? Were you still not gone to sleep or what?

Jamie Kennedy: No, I’m on west coast.

Captain Brien: Oh, so, yeah. So, it wasn’t frickin’ 4:30 a.m.?

Jamie Kennedy: Yes. Can you guys hear me? Do I have to talk like that? I don’t have to talk like that, do I?

Captain Brien: No. But I’m loud all the time. I’m Italian.

Jamie Kennedy: I know.

Captain Brien: You’re never loud, really.

Jamie Kennedy: I’m chill, bro. I’m loud on stage.

Captain Brien: Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: That’s where I get it out.

Captain Brien: That’s where you make it happen.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. And then online from Chill.

Captain Brien: This is my stage.

Jamie Kennedy: I know.

Captain Brien: I don’t get on stage.

Jamie Kennedy: I know. You want to though.

Captain Brien:I don’t.

Jamie Kennedy: You do.

Captain Brien: You think?

Jamie Kennedy: Come, dude you’re… Come on.

Captain Brien: This is purely for the entertainment of my followers.

Jamie Kennedy: That’s it.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Like, I have nothing else to do all day. I have no liquor to sell.

Jamie Kennedy: Nothing?

Captain Brien: No, I got…

Jamie Kennedy: You want to talk about your liquor?

Captain Brien: I do. I want to talk about it. Why would I not want to talk about that deliciousness? Sugar-free, Gluten-free, all-natural, Florida made.

Jamie Kennedy: It does… I’m not really drinking right now but it does look good.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: It really does look clean. I have to be honest with you. I’m impressed with it, dude.

Captain Brien: It’s all organic, dude.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I keep it nice. I’m doing the work.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: You know what I mean. Like, I want you to be healthy when you drink. Why are you not drinking right now? You doing a cleanse?

Jamie Kennedy: I dropped some weight and I feel good.

Captain Brien: You look good.

Jamie Kennedy: Thanks, bro.

Captain Brien: I like that.

Jamie Kennedy: Stop hitting

Captain Brien: I mean, it’s good. I’m gonna give you a little boop-boop

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: on the boobie.

Jamie Kennedy: Nothing wrong with that. It’s consent.

Captain Brien: It is.

Jamie Kennedy: Dude, yeah, man, you’re liquor looks good.

Captain Brien: It’s really good. I mean, it’s only been four months and we’re basically all over Florida, now.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: We’re trying to break out of the state. I gotta get out of this big ass state.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: And then that… Then it’ll be on.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. Okay.

Captain Brien: I mean, you can’t… I mean, I gotta figure, like, L.A. wants a… the lowest calorie count vodka on the market, right?

Jamie Kennedy: Definitely.

Captain Brien: Sugar-free, gluten-free, so I’m trying to get into L.A.

Jamie Kennedy: Definitely.

Captain Brien: And Miami, has done well with it, but I still could do huge things.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: So, we’re working on it.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: And I’ve got guys like you helping me promote it.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah, man.

Captain Brien: Like, how can that be a bad thing?

Jamie Kennedy: Dude, it looks beautiful. Barrel-aged bourbon.

Captain Brien: Rum.

Jamie Kennedy: Rum.

Captain Brien: In bourbon barrels. That’s–

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. Bourbon rum.

Captain Brien: Yeah. We put the… We make the rum and then we smoke bourbon barrels and we age it in there for two months.

Captain Brien: It’s a good thing.

Jamie Kennedy: You know what I think that would be good? I’m not drinking right now but if I was I would take one of those KeVita drinks. You know what those are?

Captain Brien: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: Apple cider, they have a ginger drink that’s so good. It’s natural. I bet with some of your bourbon or your rum–

Captain Brien:That’d be great.

Jamie Kennedy: Ooh. Like that would actually be refreshing–

Captain Brien: I like that.

Jamie Kennedy: And get you a little toasty.

Captain Brien: Yeah. What’s your thing? You rather…

Jamie Kennedy: Ooh. It didn’t–

Captain Brien: Yeah. The car stops itself.

Jamie Kennedy: I know.

Captain Brien: It’s good.

Jamie Kennedy: Oh, it did.

Captain Brien: Yeah. Yeah. That’s why the peo–

Jamie Kennedy: Really. Can we not u… If you don’t brake it we’ll try–

Captain Brien: I won’t break. Well, we gotta give it gas.

Jamie Kennedy: Can you tell your… What, you can get in an accident?

Captain Brien: No! Watch.

Jamie Kennedy: Please don’t.

Captain Brien: I’m gonna test it.

Jamie Kennedy: Please don’t.

Captain Brien: Look, I’m not touching it. I’m not touching it. I’m not touching it. I’m not doing nothing. Yeah. Look, it’ll stay right in. Watch.

Jamie Kennedy: Wow.

Captain Brien: Stop.

Jamie Kennedy: Okay.

Captain Brien: Look. Look. Look. Look. Complete stop, bro.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. Wow.

Captain Brien: That’s good right?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: And then it wants to tell me.

Jamie Kennedy: Damn.

Captain Brien: It told me.

Jamie Kennedy: Okay.

Captain Brien: Say, put your foot back on the brake.

Jamie Kennedy: It’s just weird.

Captain Brien: It drives like that. It’s good. It’s good. It helps with The Captain’s Log. That way I can, you know, focus fifty percent of the time. Yeah, I know, people messaging me. I wonder if there’s a reason it… I mean–

Jamie Kennedy: Uh-oh. I want to see.

Captain Brien: I hope that they can hear us. Can you guys hear us okay?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Yeah. Are we sure?

Jamie Kennedy: We’re low key.

Captain Brien: Mia, Britney, because some people are messaging me on text and I just wanted to make sure. Sometimes that happens, like, if the mics are wacky or something.

Jamie Kennedy: Um. Yeah.

Captain Brien: People are like, yo, message. But I don’t know why I can’t really see the messages. I just see the people are watching. They’re watching but they’re not messaging? Oh, then maybe they are. Anyway, tell me about what’s been going on in your life these days, man.

Jamie Kennedy: Oh, man. I’ve been working on… I just got my special.

Captain Brien: Yeah. That’s awesome. Where’d you shoot it?

Jamie Kennedy: I shot it in Huntington Beach at a place called The Rec Room. It’s awesome.

Captain Brien: Really?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Is it like one of those, like, rock night club, kinda comedy club kinda places? Or is it a straight theater?

Jamie Kennedy: No, it’s a new… It’s a club, named by this guy, Hunter, and he’s like a connoisseur of comedy. He’s also a comedian and he made a really intimate venue and it’s just–

Captain Brien: Really.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. It’s just awesome.

Captain Brien: Why didn’t you shoot it at my venue, that’s what I want to know?

Jamie Kennedy: Dude, I didn’t know I could.

Captain Brien: Oh, okay. Like I have a–

Jamie Kennedy: I would have.

Captain Brien: Oh, my God.

Jamie Kennedy: South Florida.

Captain Brien: I thought we were so tight, dude.

Jamie Kennedy: We can. I can come back and shoot like an extra hour.

Captain Brien: Yeah. We can shoot, like, the behind the scenes with the Captain.

Jamie Kennedy: I’ve got stuff at your place though. Some good heckles.

Captain Brien: Some good jokes, too.

Jamie Kennedy: There’s some people… I’ve had some good interaction. You know that.

Captain Brien: You have.

Jamie Kennedy: Those white women like their white wine out here, in Naples.

Captain Brien: That’s a good thing. You keep it real on stage and then they like to speak up.

Jamie Kennedy: I know. There’s nothing wrong with that ladies. This weekend let me get my jokes out before you interrupt.

Captain Brien: Yeah. He doesn’t need a sidekick.

Jamie Kennedy: But, you know it’s Easter weekend so, you know, let’s get your white wine on.

Captain Brien: How’d you get on stage the first time?

Jamie Kennedy: How?

Captain Brien: How did that happen? Jamie Kennedy wants to be a comedian or Jamie Kennedy just fell into it? What happened?

Jamie Kennedy: I was moved to L.A. and I was interested in Hollywood and I was an extra, right. You know what that is?

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: And it was hard to become an extra, actually. There’s a lot of competition.

Captain Brien: Yeah. Everybody out there is like a server and they’re always extras everywhere.

Jamie Kennedy: Yes. So, it’s like, you know, hit you up and say we need a young high school student, you have these clothes or a security guard or whatever. You have to put yourself on avails. Anyway, I was kind of doing that, but it was hard. And my friend was just… works in a restaurant and the guy was like you’re funny, you should try stand-up and I didn’t know what it was. I knew what it was. Enough people told me and that’s when I was like… So, then I went to an open mic, I did it and I did good.

Captain Brien: Were you scared shitless?

Jamie Kennedy: Shitless. I had no idea at anything.

Captain Brien: Did you write down your jokes or did you just try to–?

Jamie Kennedy: Yes.

Captain Brien: You did.

Jamie Kennedy: I wrote down jokes and I also did Dana Carvey’s jokes.

Captain Brien: Were any of them any good beside Dana Carvey’s?

Jamie Kennedy: No, it was only Dana Carvey’s jokes.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: That were work. And I was like, I have nothing and like a couple jokes from a joke book. And then, but like an old joke book.

Captain Brien: Right.

Jamie Kennedy: And then I was like, oh, okay. What I learned from that was I could stay on stage and I could deliver a joke and I could make a crowd of people laugh.

Captain Brien: Sure.

Jamie Kennedy: And then I was like, hmm. So, then I tried it again and–

Captain Brien: Half the challenge is keeping the audience in tune.

Jamie Kennedy: Yes.

Captain Brien: They have to listen to what you say and some people, if you can’t do that, it doesn’t matter how funny your joke is.

Jamie Kennedy: Yes.

Captain Brien: They have to be listening.

Jamie Kennedy: They have to be. And so, that worked and then the next time I did it, I did it at a Ramada Inn and I bombed.

Captain Brien: You did? Did you–

Jamie Kennedy: Horrifically.

Captain Brien:Then what, were you scared–

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: Even more?

Jamie Kennedy: Then I didn’t do it for like six months.

Captain Brien: You took six months off. Did you write during those six months or did you say, like, I’m not doing it again, the hell with it?

Jamie Kennedy: Why would I do that? Why would I ever do that? That’s what I thought.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: So, I started. I did it. I could do it. Did it again. Can’t do it. And then around 1991, I started again.

Captain Brien: You just got balls back and said I’m gonna go back on stage.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. A little bit. Like this. And then, on and off open mic here and open mic there. Then 1992, I committed and I said, I’m gonna go to this open mic every day. There was an open mic every day from 5:00 to 7:00.

Captain Brien: Where was that?

Jamie Kennedy: It was called the L.A. Cabaret. It’s on Ventura Boulevard. And like now, comics pay for open mics which is crazy to me.

Captain Brien: They pay to get on stage.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. They pay.

Captain Brien: It’s so interesting because I’ll run an open mic and I’ll have literally like 40 people show up and every day goes… There’s not a day that goes by where someone’s like, when’s your open mic? So, I’ll have like 40 people sign-up, not show up. And then like literally, 15 people will show up and it’s the same 15 people that have been doing my open mics for ten years. It’s like what happened to the other 40 or the emails that I get every day? People saying, I want to do an open mic man. It’s so cool. You know what it is, they love the idea of being a comedian and doing the open mic but then when it comes down to getting on stage, I think that they don’t realize how much balls it takes and they get scared at the last minute.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah, maybe.

Captain Brien: Right? But out in L.A. it’s so competitive they’re paying to be in open mics.

Jamie Kennedy: Yes.

Captain Brien: You’re kidding me.

Jamie Kennedy: No.

Captain Brien: That’s like shelf space at like a liquor store. They’re like, oh, you want to be on my shelf, you gotta pay me to sell your product.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah, man. I mean, listen, I’m fortunate. I mean I’m doing what I–

Captain Brien: Well, of course–

Jamie Kennedy: But I’ve never… When I was coming up you never had to do that.

Captain Brien: Right.

Jamie Kennedy: It was open mics at coffee houses and you’d sign up and sometimes you wouldn’t get picked but you wouldn’t have to pay. You know. And then if you started, got one laugh or two laughs a set, then people started noticing you and you go okay come back and–

Captain Brien: You’d always be on the roster for that open mic.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. Like I–

Captain Brien: Who’s the guy that’s running the racket that you have to pay? That’s awesome.

Jamie Kennedy: Dude.

Captain Brien: That’s a great–

Jamie Kennedy:just gave you an idea. I just gave you an idea.

Captain Brien: You want to buy six days time start paying the piper. Captain’s ready. Right here. Put it on there!

Jamie Kennedy: I don’t know because you have to have a real crowd and you can’t just pay for an open mic, no offense to the people doing it, and then have all comedians. You have to have real people, in my opinion.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: That’s my opinion. But, like, that’s what it was. The open mic, when I was doing it, was mostly comedians with some real people and I would sign up every day. We’d get picked like three to four times and I would clean up the club and whatever just to get that stage time. And that’s how I started. Then once I did that, and I was like… The guy was like, okay, you know I was young and you can just show your diligence and that’s how I did it. Then he like… Each day, if you got a joke to work and a teeny bit better and that’s how you build.

Captain Brien: That’s so interesting, because we’re like in a comedy vortex in Florida. The open micers think that, like, they can just get on stage anywhere, any time for any reason. Whether they stink it up or not. Like, they just keep having ability to get on stage. It’s… But we produce a lot of good comics in Florida, right?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. Obviously.

Captain Brien: Yeah. And then you go out to L.A. and New York and it’s competitive as hell, right?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. It is. It’s… Yeah, well, it’s the mecca. L.A. might be the hottest place in the world for comedy. I think it is right now.

Captain Brien: I think it is.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I think it is.

Jamie Kennedy: But it’s… Look, I mean, you know, comedy is it’s own journey. You can start here and get good here and move then–

Captain Brien: How did you get the show, The Jamie Kennedy Experience? Which by the way, as a kid, was one of my favs. I mean, I loved it. Absolutely loved it.

Jamie Kennedy: As a kid?

Captain Brien: Well, I mean, no just coming up. Like, you know, MTV and everything else. It’s just Jamie Kennedy was the jam. That was so dope. How did that come about?

Jamie Kennedy: I did Scream and then I got, you know, I did Scream 2 and I got hot off of that. And then, you know my agents were like, you should do TV and I was like, oh, okay, well, I’m doing movies. And they were like, you can do TV and they knew I had another side to me. So, I always had this idea to do some kind of sketch show–

Captain Brien: So, was that your idea?

Jamie Kennedy: Partially. It was partially my idea to do sketches and characters that the producers of MADD TV got involved and we thought of like how to do it with a hidden camera angle and so it was like hidden camera meets SNL. So, it was like us doing live sketches with real people watching and not knowing. And we developed it for a while then boom, it was like an underground cult–

Captain Brien: Yeah, it was like a hit.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. So, I was lucky but I–

Captain Brien: Was Scream the one that launched you or was it that, that really…? I mean people had to recognize you from Scream but then when you said the Jamie Kennedy Experience, I think that’s what–

Jamie Kennedy: Well, that’s–

Captain Brien: What really must have put you on the map, right?

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. Scream did, is like, oh, your Randy, Jamie Kennedy. Oh, your Jamie Kennedy, because that was my show–

Captain Brien: Right.

Jamie Kennedy: With my name on it. Yeah. But that was the one that really, Jamie Kennedy every week on TV.

Captain Brien: Right, exactly. That’s when the big checks started rolling in.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. I said, I tell anyone who’s on TV put your name in the title.

Captain Brien: Of course.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. It helps.

Captain Brien: Executive producer.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. I mean. Jamie Kennedy.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: That’s so–

Captain Brien: I put my name on everything.

Jamie Kennedy: Captain Brien’s Barrel-Aged Rum.

Captain Brien: Yeah, dude.

Jamie Kennedy: No.

Captain Brien: Vodka, barrel-aged rum, I do it all.

Jamie Kennedy: Barreling, rum.

Captain Brien: Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: But not bourbon.

Captain Brien: No. It’s barrel-aged rum. I switched it up, dude.

Jamie Kennedy: Alright, man.

Captain Brien: Everyone wants to be crafty, so I do the little hand crafted cocktail right in the rum, baby.

Jamie Kennedy: I love it. The burnt, the burnt taste.

Captain Brien: What, do you have sun? These windows are illegally tinted and the sun is still coming through.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah. It’s pretty strong.

Captain Brien: Yeah. You can put this like this. The lighting guy, right now is struggling.

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: I got to talk to these camera guys, I tell you. They should be doing more.

Jamie Kennedy: Captain’s Log.

Captain Brien: Alright guys, so listen, you know my guest Jamie Kennedy from Scream, from the Jamie Kennedy Experience, from everything under the sun. Let’s face it. This dude’s a superstar and we are… Look it, a lot of people are watching right now.

Jamie Kennedy: Are we doing good?

Captain Brien: Yeah. A lot of people are watching.

Jamie Kennedy: How high is it? 114 people.

Captain Brien: Yeah. They like you.

Jamie Kennedy: Living the dream.

Captain Brien: We can’t go off now. We have to stay live because so many people started watching.

Jamie Kennedy: Wow. Is this a good number?

Captain Brien: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: Alright.

Captain Brien: They’re jumping. I have a feeling–

Jamie Kennedy: Do they have questions?

Captain Brien: Ask me a question and we will tell you who’s on right now.

Jamie Kennedy: That a kid? That a question?

Captain Brien: So–

Jamie Kennedy: This is a kid.

Captain Brien:So, back in the day, back in the day, did you really think that you were gonna be famous or did you just all of a sudden want to be a comedian because you got that little bug when you went on stage at the open mic?

Captain Brien: Why’d you go to L.A.? I mean you moved out to L.A., right? Because you wanted to be a movie star.

Jamie Kennedy: I wanted to be famous.

Captain Brien: But why’d you know, why’d you want to be famous? Like a movie star? How did you know that? Were you in like dramas as a kid? How did you know?

Jamie Kennedy: No, I mean, I’ll be honest with you. I’ll be real with you. It’s like there was obviously something lacking inside of me that wanted attention.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: And I was always doing like voices and either people thought I was really funny or really weird. And I could never have a regular job because I always get fired.

Captain Brien: How many jobs did you get fired from?

Jamie Kennedy: 36. I have–

Captain Brien: 36.

Jamie Kennedy: I have a journal of it.

Captain Brien: No way.

Jamie Kennedy: From Red Lobster to Domino’s, I got fired from most of them. Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: Besides–

Captain Brien: Red Lobster, they wish they kept you man.

Jamie Kennedy: I know.

Captain Brien: Can you imagine the promos you could have shot for those suckers?

Jamie Kennedy: Cheddar bay, baby.

Captain Brien: Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: Um, but I was always like, I always felt like I could tell the boss more what to do and I hated people did the–

Captain Brien: That works well.

Jamie Kennedy: I know. I didn’t feel like they understood what they were doing.

Captain Brien: Yeah. They didn’t know how to run their own business.

Jamie Kennedy: Uh-uh.

Captain Brien: You knew–

Jamie Kennedy: Well, I just knew–

Captain Brien: As an eighteen year old server.

Jamie Kennedy: how to be efficient. Seventeen. I was, I was a busboy.

Captain Brien: That’s awesome. That’s awesome.

Jamie Kennedy: But, you know. I mean, and then you start, you know. I don’t know. Then once you try it boom! Then I got a little encouragement, even though when I bombed, somebody would go, yo, you’re funny. Even though you bombed. And I was like delusional enough that I was like huh–

Captain Brien: Oh, that’s great. Yeah. And, but no, were you one of those guys who came off stage and thought you crushed it or were you like… How ’bout that? How does that work?

Jamie Kennedy: I try not to be that person but I know–

Captain Brien: Dude, I killed it tonight. I’m like, yeah, I herd six laughs. How does that…? How do you in your mind think?

Jamie Kennedy: That’s real. Actually, I’m the opposite. I think I… Well, no.

Captain Brien: You do… I know now. No, now you’re on a this like, how’d I do? And I’m like the place was dying laughing. What do you mean how’d you do?

Jamie Kennedy: I feel that, um, no, there’s people that there just comedians that bomb years, you know and the kill years and all of that. But I feel that I was a person that would feel when I got a laugh. I was like, ooh that was a tough set but that one area was good, right?

Captain Brien: Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie Kennedy: But, no. I try to keep it kind of semi-honest opinion about myself. But, yeah, you’re right, I probably have been delusional at times.

Captain Brien: Really?

Jamie Kennedy: That I’ve done better than I thought I did.

Captain Brien: I like when I make a post and I’m like, this one’s gonna get so many likes and then it’s like dead. And I’m like, damn that sucks!

Jamie Kennedy: Yeah.

Captain Brien: How ’bout that, dude? That’s like a perfect judge right, everyone online, on Instagram, on Facebook, now. If you get a lot of likes then you’re freaking… Oh, I think my buddy Josh Pray, who by the way is dope. You need to meet Josh. Superstar on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube. He must have shared it because that’s why so many people jumped on.

Jamie Kennedy: Alright.

Captain Brien: I’m guessing. Josh, what’s up, buddy?

Jamie Kennedy: Hey, buddy.

Captain Brien: I can’t see the comments right now for some reason. But anyway, this is The Captain’s Log. I have Jamie Kennedy as my guest. Love you guys watching. Check it out. You can follow Jamie Kennedy. One more time how–?

Jamie Kennedy: TheJamieKennedy on Instagram. JamieKennedy on Twitter. Facebook is BlueCheck. You know. Jamie Kennedy.

Captain Brien: You got to follow him guys. Check me out at any time. You can hear The Captain’s Log podcast. I shoot it every day. Give me a like. If you want to follow me, I would love that. But in the mean time, we’re going right now. Jamie Kennedy will be at Off the Hook Comedy Club this weekend Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Get tickets. Www.Offthehookcomedy.com. We out. I’ll be back tomorrow. Love you the most.


Episode 247 You Should Punch Up Your Jokes!



WWE Star turned Comedian, Dolph Ziggler, and Sarah Tiana join Captain Brien on this episode of the #naplescaptainslog! They discuss Dolphs career in the WWE and how he became a comedian!

Watch Full Video —————>  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPh4KXtoFbQ&t=1s

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Funny jokes and notes from a day and the life Off the hook Comedy Club. Off the hook comedy club post on twitter daily follow us #naplescaptainslog for the latest info.

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Check Comedians Dolph Ziggler and Sarah Tiana out and show them some love at: